Wow I really do suck at keeping up with this...

So I am supposed to be packing for the much anticipated Dragon*Con, but I am a champion procrastinator, and this time you are the beneficiary. Spouse and I have been eagerly looking forward to this trip since the super-awesome time we had last year at the Con. This year we are more prepared and know what to expect, so we won't be missing a single thing! We also have a hotel room this year and plenty of time-off requested (I even have a recov day planned!).

I am feeling a wee bit hormonal, or maybe Spouse is the most annoying person in the world, maybe both is true. The fact that I hate my new job violently probable isn't helping the whole "mood" thing. I really do have to keep the stress in check, more meditating less worrying.

OK, fine, I guess I'll get busy...see you on the other side.

See, I'm back again and so soon!

I have to stop addressing my blog, it's a little too "Dear Diary" for my taste. I am meant to be cleaning right now, so of course here I am. I love the above picture, it's hilarious, yet pretty in a way. It's such a pretty day, my mom and my dad are coming tomorrow. I really need to prepare their room and spruce up the bathroom. All I want to do is take a nap. It's too late for caffeine, it's out of the question. I want to actually get to sleep tonight. My mom can have coffee at anytime of the day and still fall asleep on the couch at 8:30 while watching a movie. A month without caffeine and I felt great, I was ready to do without for awhile. Then when I started to consume it again I found the addiction picked up right where it left off. Maybe I should give it for good this time, no reason just to make myself feel better. I'll still have the booze! Can't live without the alcohol. Speaking of, I think I will have some right now. Oh wait the cleaning...

Facebook stole my heart, for a little while

I will try not to abandon you again blog. Lots of things have happened since I wrote on you last. Some good, some bad. All life changing. As I change, I find I am the optimist that I always knew I was. Dealing with hard times, and disappointment there really is no room for defeatism. I thought that I would buckle and slip into the silent, depressive state I've romanticised ever since I read the Bell Jar and the like when I was a teen. Instead I was just, alright. The logical part of my brain, that I've down-played even to myself, stepped up. It filled my head with all sort of smart observances and practical ideas. So I am here. Changed, but still myself. More so some may say. There are still tears that come from no where, but they are further and farther between. It seems I am strong. I have found that in the face of loss there is something to be gained and that is reassuring.

It's freakin' Baby Goats, common!

There are no words, Happy Friday!

New President feels like I waited my whole life for this...

I have been a liberal, as I have stated before, since I was 9 years old. My first vote was in 2000, second in 2004, I guess the third time was a charm! I was starting to think I was a jinx. The actual fulfillment of the dream of having the person I voted for to take office has been realized today. I pledge to put my might were my mouth is, we can change this country. We must. No act is too small. We can be the change.

What is what?

No resolutions. Not this year. They never get me anywhere. What is the point? We can talk about doing or we can do. I am a legendary talker. I am known for my overwhelming verbosity. I love to tell a story. I admit, I am a gossip, but the truth is I'll dish on my own biz if the dish is good. I just like to talk. I can listen too, if I feel like it. I am tired of being all talk. I think it may be time for me to shut-up...well not for too long.

Christmas-y feelings on the rise....

A lovely quiet day. The next 4 days will be anything but. I work retail so I will be in the lion's den. Everything is going to be alright, though, because I have just the cure....My christmas spirit is here!!!! Today I watched Scrooge (1970), the musical with Albert Finney. Oh it is divine! Young Albert Finney is so fetching! I am so filled with the christmas spirit I did this to my hair today.....
Half of it is bright red now! I hope everyone is drunk with the spirit of the season! If not just get drunk, full stop.

The Holidays are Here?

Maybe it's just that there wasn't as much time between T-day and X-mas, but it doesn't feel like Christmas time. It could be the warm weather, it could be the lack of customers at the retail shop where I work. My tree is up, I decorated, I've watched some movies-nothing. I don't know why, I just don't feel it this year. I feel like I haven't had enough holiday marinating time. You know music, movies, nog/cider, and tree gazing. I should plan to do that, but when? I had to let go of my cards this year, there just isn't enough time. I don't know what I AM doing with all of my time. I should write out a schedule and see where all the time is going, but who has time for that?

Turkey day come and gone....

Thanksgiving this year was a two part affair at the Ramirez household. On Thanksgiving proper Randall had to work all day. So my sister Natalie and I had the lovely food you see above, just the two of us. We watched movies (not holiday flicks but movies with transvestites!), took a stroll in our neighborhood (at our own peril!), and napped (well tried to, but just ended up laughing 'til we cried) all in all perfection! Quiet, peaceful, basically the complete opposite of Saturday or Thanksgiving Observed. I am so excited by one discovery I made due to this bifurcated thanksgiving celebration TURKEY BREAST! I'm not a real big dark meat person so when I made this super easy, super tasty turkey breast for me and Natalie, I pledged my undying love and allegiance forever.

My middle sister and her family joined us on Saturday. This is the only picture I got since we were all talking and visiting so much I forgot to take any. If there were other pictures I had taken they would have been of:

Eric, my sister's soon-to-be husband, sitting on the couch watching (read as sleeping, snoring) football (I know. Football at my house!)

Randall and Preston playing video games in the guest room.

Jessica cookin' up a storm in the kitchen.

Declan causing destruction everywhere he goes.

Fun was had by all.......

Heaven and Hell

Oh Joy! Finally after all the waiting, it's here! The new Wally Lamb. It is a delicious 740 pages long. At once I am faced with the Reader's Dilemma, reading voraciously only brings the end faster. Alas, how can one not read voraciously when there is such a book to be read? I will savor this moment when the book is still there, unconquered. Soon it will be inside of my head.

Speaking of inside my head, with all the joys of election day there was a defeat. I am continually amazed at how selfish and short-sighted opponents of same-sex marriage can be. How can you be so filled with hateful, righteous indignation and stand in the street and yell and carry signs so that people can't get married?! It is important to me because as a person I want all people to enjoy the same rights, benefits, responsibilities I have everyday simply because I was born into a middle-class, educated, white family and have chosen to live my life with a male-bodied partner. If not for these accidents of birth, I wouldn't be able to rest with my privileges. So I try not to rest. I understand the fervor over abortion, I am firmly pro-choice, but I get it. It's about life and death for pro-lifers. So while I do not believe in their politics or methods, I understand their passion. Where is the issue with gay marriage? Especially in California where the weddings had already been taking place, where was the life and death? Where was the harm? What is the point of opposing something so vehemently that has nothing to do with you or your religion. Marriage has, for some time now, been removed from the religious sphere. It is a matter of state and I think there may be a little something written somewhere about the two being separate. As long as humans have been around, we have wanted to control each other's actions. The reasons are varied and the results mostly disastrous. It's time. It's time to let it go. It's time to mind our own little red wagons on this issue. There is no harm. There is only love. I think we can all stand up for that.

Well this link below pretty much says it all...except I tend to run a little more emotional than violent. A few more tears a few less Boo-yas!

http://madmonq.wordpress.com/2008/11/05/salaam-al-alaikum-fundamentalists-neo-cons-pumas-suckas/

I am so proud of America. I knew we had it in us!

Hope is contagious...pass it on.

GO VOTE!!!!!

You are not allowed to complain if you don't cast your ballot. I have already voted. Randall and I voted on our anniversary, in the rain, waiting on line in excess of an hour. I felt so proud to touch the little box on the screen next to Mr. Obama's name. The importance and significance of this election was almost too much for me at that moment. I am not ashamed to say that my eyes began to sting with tears. A non-white candidate for president with a real chance of winning, I am so proud of America.

When I was 12 years old I remember watching Clinton on the TV. I remember being so enthralled, not just with him but with the whole process. At school I debated for him (I mean Bush did lie about those "new taxes"), I joined the Young Democrats of Alabama and embraced my role as a liberal very much in the minority in Sylacauga, AL. I have never been as excited about a candidate since then, until now. I am not going into details, I am not trying to campaign it is way too late for that (even though McCain might disagree). I love America. Even though I joke about moving away to other cool places, I know America is the land I love. I know it's not cool to admit it, at least outside of a country-western song, but I do. Not even the past 8 years can taint this life-long romance.

4 years ago...

I can't believe that it has been four years since Randall and I got married. I never thought I would get married so young. What have I honestly learned over the last 4 years (and the two before that)? So many things. I tried to write it all out, but it just sounded pretentious and like maybe I should wait a few years before saying I know anything about marriage. I figure up until this point we have gotten very lucky. Just as lucky as we were the day we met.

Things I love/things I hate just because...

Here are my goat friends from across the way. I love goats, I don't know why or where this love came from. It is here now so I will enjoy it.

I hate Tyra Banks. She is weird and overly self-involved. It doesn't take a special talent to make everything in life about you. Believe me I know....

I love Pushing Daisies. If you haven't seen this show please rent the first season it is so sweet and clever and there is even knitting (Mom)! The only problem, as Randall and I found out the hard way, is the unavoidable pie cravings.

I hate people who are willfully uninformed. You have to actively avoid information in today's media saturated culture. How then do some people keep themselves in the dark? I'm not talking about whether Jen Anniston and John Mayer are together again. (They are) I'm talking about knowing which candidate for president best represents your beliefs and vision of the future of America. Come on people.

I love my back porch. It's covered by trees, so that the light dapples through onto what I am reading. I can't get enough.

I hate that the new Harry Potter movie isn't coming out this year. I need Rupert, Daniel and Emma and I am not ashamed.

I love Larabars. They are made out of dates and nuts and other stuff. They taste good, except for the cashew ones they are gross.

I hate passive-aggressive assholes. 'nuff said.

and one last love I love my husband. We have been together for 6 years (married for 4) and I'm not tired of him yet. He is perfect. 'nuff said.

Here is nerdy(?) me...

I love my glasses. The pink is a little faded, it is subtle, no? I think I will stick with pink for a while, then maybe purple. I know I used to seriously hate purple, but I have made peace with the purple. Stay tuned for more... I hope you have a nice day.

Horror at The Grit!

I had to post this picture at Randall's behest. He took it at The Grit during brunch. The composition is excellent for a camera phone. I wish I had that lovely cup of coffee right now. They have the best roast at The Grit. This picture however is a failure since it shows neither my pink hair or my new glasses (they are not reading glasses, but far-away glasses). You never know how blind you actually are until you get glasses. Oh the wonders I can see now, like road signs and pedestrians in the road! Next picture I post will show all three of my new image updates. I'll let you wonder what the third is, and what in that Bitch magazine is making me make that face.

No more blurry girl...

My mom says that she doesn't want to see "that blurry girl" anymore, which is what she calls the picture in my previous post. Which is funny because that picture is perfectly indicative of my current station in life. I feel I don't know where my edges are anymore. Having been through a somewhat troubling, definitely trying, period of my life, I feel a bit aimless. Not to sound super contrite, but I feel like I am lost in a fog. My very wise and strong Aunt Linda says "sometimes dreams change." I am positive they do as mine are changing. The problem is I haven't found new ones yet. I think that is the cause of my current blurry mood. I have never really been without a concrete goal and plan. I just must keep learning and growing and when the fog lifts, it will be there- my shiny new dream. I have to be alright with wandering for a little while.

just a quick post...

I have been quite busy with a project for awhile. Now that I have put that on the back burner (for now) I feel I will have more of an occasion to write. I have a few irons in the fire hopefully soon some with bear fruit. Wow talk about mixing metaphors! Looking forward...

Farmer's market, reading, a gay doc and Indy

These are the beautiful herbs that I got at the new Athens Farmer's Market this morning. I got up sooo early this morning to get there while the pickin's were still good. I got mint, basil, cilantro and onions all for $8! I am so happy I could bust. I can't wait to take Randall next Saturday. I came home and read on my back porch for as long as I wanted, which is just heaven to me. The seemingly unlimited time of days off. I hate time constraints. I understand that we must have clocks and schedules or there would be chaos, but I prefer timekeeping to be a little less rigid.
I eventually got hungry and made a lovely breakfast out of my farmer's market finds. Also, I made some lovely wheat scones from scratch--without a recipe! They weren't very pretty so, no picture. They tasted very good, if I do say so myself, with jam and butter.
I am watching Before Stonewall a chronicle of homosexuality in America before the historical Stonewall Riot. I highly reccomend anyone interested in this subject to see this well-made documentary.
Cassy and I are going to see Indiana Jones this afternoon. I am mildly excited. I remember loving the old Indy movies, mostly due to the fact that Harrison Ford was my boyfriend for most of my childhood. I loved him so much. Thinking back on it I don't remember when it started, but it just was. My mom loved Al Pacino, I loved Harrison. Then he got that tacky earring and started dating Calista Flockhart and it was over.
It seems like a truly kick-ass movie comes out like every week this summer. Next week is Sex and the City! I have very carefully avoided any media on the movie so that I might be as suprised by the plot as possible. So only one more week to go. I hope I make it.

Happy Saturday!